A huge decision for me...

I suppose this blog is a perfectly good place for me to try to figure out my plans for the fall. Here's my situation:

I love what I'm teaching now, I love the kids I teach, I hate the place I'm in. There aren't many young people around here, and the young people who are here are all either married or dating someone, and they're all part of a "group" that I don't fit in with. They're nice enough, but I wouldn't say that I have any real friends here.

In fact, I don't have many real friends anymore. I still have my girls from university to some extent, but we've all moved away and have our own lives now. I came to this realization this weekend when Sean and I were discussing our friends (or lack thereof). I was really upset. I mean, Sean is my best friend but everyone needs other friends. I feel like I've been lacking something since I've moved to Saskatoon and then to my present location, and I think this is it.

So that's one part of it. Another issue I have to consider and decide on is my future plans, career-wise. I have two options: I can stay here for another year (my position isn't confirmed for next year yet, but it sounds like it will be), or I could move back to Saskatoon to find something there. There are pros and cons to each. I'm one of those "lists" people, so here's my pros and cons list (list items in no particular order).

Pros of staying here:
- work experience - my current position is the perfect combination of subject areas for me
- I do really like the kids here
- the money

Cons of staying here:
- no opportunity to make friends
- it would mean another year of driving back and forth to see Sean every other weekend
- I would be faced with the stress of looking for a job in a year since the longest I will stay here is for 1 year anyway
- some of my supervisors at work are changing and I'm not sure I'll have the support I'll need to do my job as well as I have been. I have no training in special ed and I depend on my current supervisor so much... and I'm not sure the person who replaces her will be as supportive

Pros of moving to Saskatoon:
- Sean - we could live together, get married this summer and basically start our life together
- the prospects of making some friends and finding a social place for myself
- less driving (my car isn't exactly new)
- I could take piano lessons
- hopefully gain new experiences in a different school setting to get my foot in the door in Stoon
- if I couldn't find a teaching or subbing job there, I could probably go back to work at the group home or at Cosmo Industries

Cons of moving to Saskatoon:
- there will be no guarantee of a job until at least May
- I may earn less money if I am subbing
- I may be missing out on valuable work experience in the field I want to eventually work in anyway

I think I know what my decision will be, but I want to be absolutely sure. I welcome any opinions and suggestions!!

On a different note, I think I'm getting the hang of driving a manual vehicle!! We cruised around town today and I only stalled twice. The REALLY exciting thing was that I drove when there were other vehicles around and I didn't even have a panic attack. I've had an interesting history with Sean's car (I thought I wrecked it in the parking lot of an Ontario mall, I freaked out in it driving home from Hamilton when I couldn't stop stalling it, and we generally have not gotten along), but I think I'm making peace with it. Sean's willing to trade it off on an automatic but I really want to try to figure this out since he did just buy it 5 months ago.

I'll finish this entry on a happy note. *big pat on back to myself for updating and for getting more comfortable with a standard*